


How it could have been

by DianaLeto89



Series: Stargate Vignettes [4]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: AU, Angst, F/M, Happy Ending, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-20
Updated: 2016-03-20
Packaged: 2018-05-27 21:32:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6301198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DianaLeto89/pseuds/DianaLeto89
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU where Daniel is picked up by Qetesh and not SG-1 after he deascends. How will he react when he learns she wants to perfect the plan that Apophis had before? Will he regain his memory? How will he handle a freshly freed Vala?</p>
            </blockquote>





	How it could have been

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little idea I had when I rewatched the episode where Sha're has the baby.

Daniel Jackson once again spent time to take stock of his surroundings. The cell aboard the Goa’uld Mothership hadn’t changed much in his lengthy time aboard.  _Still empty and cold._  When he had awoken naked on that planet, whatever planet that had been, he had no idea who he was. The fact that he didn’t get to spend much time trying to figure it out was part of the reason, he was sure, that he still didn’t quite know who he was and how he had come to be in this place. He knew his name, or so he thought, and had a vague grasp of who he was before he came here. Beyond the brief flashes of memory and his, admittedly, tenuous grasp on his personality there wasn’t anything that he knew. Well, nothing except  _her._   _And what a joy it is._

She had appeared literally out of the sky and had shown him to this place. She had said she would take care of him. She had said he would be kept safe. She had  _promised_  to help him get home, to discover who he is or at least who he was. She had said a lot of things but she hadn’t kept any of her promises. Daniel spent days trapped in this cell, the cold walls and floor seeping into his bones. The loneliness was the worst part of the cell. The company was the worst part of outside the cell.

The guards were brutal and as cold as space. They didn’t care that he was confused and weak. They didn’t care that he was terrified. They didn’t _care_ at all. After four months of living this way he was beginning to crave her presence. He knew part of that was from the pheromones she was pumping into his system, he knew that. But another part of him, deep inside, knew that he just wanted the company. He felt safe in her arms after they came together. Even as he was being used by her he knew that he was using her too.  _I’ll give you my body and you give me yours. I want comfort, you want security. Done._

The months had trickled by after the change in his feelings towards her and he could see the privileges he was being given as a favoured one. Qetesh was quite solicitous to him. She wanted something from him and she was willing to give him a few gifts to keep him pliable. The plan she had felt familiar to him for some reason. He knew his part in it at least and he had certainly been  _active_  in that part. Somewhere inside he knew he should be disgusted by it but he was so confused he didn’t know what to think.

The memories began to come back to him, slowly at first like waking from a dream. He knew he was a member of SG-1. He knew what they did. He knew he had been married and his wife had been taken by a Goa’uld. When he looked at Qetesh he thought that maybe she had been his wife and that was why the Goa’uld had come for him. He didn’t have any memories of her but he felt a distinct urge to help her. He just wasn’t sure why.  _That’s unfortunate._

Another prisoner was brought into his cell. This man was supposed to act as a servant to him. Daniel was acutely uncomfortable with this but it was nice to have someone to talk to about what he remembered. As he shared himself with this other man, he felt himself slowly coming back into himself. He remembered his wife, Sha’re. He remembered her son. He remembered why the plan seemed so familiar. He remembered how he should feel. The disgust was indescribable.

Daniel began to formulate a plan. He would convince the guards to trust him and when they least expected it he would steal an Al’Kesh, head to the neared planet, and gate to Earth. Simple. Sort of. He just needed to bide his time a little longer. He was tempted to try and get the host of Qetesh out somehow. This woman was a victim even more so than he was. She had served as host for who knows how long to a murderous, power hungry, sexual deviant. He didn’t think it was possible so he didn’t factor her into his escape.

He was ready to go; tomorrow was the day. He knew it had to be, it was getting harder and harder to stay. He was summoned to the throne room just like countless times before. He knew that he’d have to endure what was coming so that he could make his escape on the way back to his cell. The guards guided him along the corridors to their queen and god.

He knew things had changed when he entered the throne room and Qetesh was still sitting on her throne. _Crap, why isn’t she on the bed?_  She had a smug look on her face that made Daniel’s stomach tighten and his palms sweat. He had a bad feeling about this and knew that whatever had made Qetesh happy was undoubtedly going to have the opposite effect on him. He stood before her and waited for the shoe to drop.

Her eyes glowed and the symbiote deepened voice rang out with disgusting glee. “Daniel, I am pleased to tell you that our little plan has proven true.” Daniel fought hard against the instinct to shout or scream or cry. _Or vomit_. He also fought the feeling of the ground rushing towards him. Passing out wouldn’t help him. “I now carry our child within me.” The smile grew and with it his dread. “Now Daniel, as I know you are aware, I cannot maintain control of this body because it will end the pregnancy. So I will be trusting  _you,_ ” her smile grew impossibly bigger, “to take care of my dear host. I’m sure she’ll be nervous and anxious and you are _perfectly_ suited to take care of her. As we speak your cell is being prepared for the new edition. I thank you Daniel, for your assistance in all of this. You have been quite,” and here she smirked, “ _helpful_.”

***

Daniel really hated that he had begun to  _like_  this woman. Vala. They were both in a terrible and impossible situation but, he could admit, that she was smart, cunning, and even kind of funny. If he wasn’t reminded of what Qetesh had forced them to do he might even be willing to admit that he thought she was attractive. Once Qetesh decided to ‘ _sleep’_  Daniel found himself holding the shaking body of one Vala Mal Doran. She was practically catatonic the first two days. Her shared memories of the various centuries worth of tragedies began to overwhelm her. Daniel had a pretty good idea of what it was like when your memories came flooding back and didn’t make sense. He grudgingly admitted that Qetesh had been right, he  _was_  suited to take care of this woman. They had a lot in common actually.

Vala, Daniel had learned, was the daughter of a con-artist who had been sold,  _sold_  to Qetesh when she was young. Sold by her step-mother of all people. _Wicked indeed._ She had just spent the last fifty years as a host. Qetesh had used Vala’s body to wage war, commit murder, and take many different conquests. The mental anguish Vala endured was unbelievable. She tried to shrug it off and smile it away but Daniel knew she was suffering. He could hear her weeping at night when she thought he was asleep. It took all he had not to go over to her and wrap his arms around her. All he had wasn’t going to be enough after long.

***

Two months into the pregnancy Daniel and Vala had hatched a plan. Similar to Daniels original plan that had been derailed by two blue lines on a stick but now including Vala. She was sneaky and brilliant and could hit really, really hard. He’d learned that in the first few days of their cohabitation. So on the day they had decided to make their escape Vala bent at the waist, her arms held tight around her middle, and groaned in pain. Daniel rushed to her and called out for help.

Sure enough the guards who trusted Daniel implicitly and who had been charged with Vala’s safety rushed in and grabbed her. The bigger one, who Daniel had been mentally referring to as not-Teal’c but whom Vala had told him was named Saltran, scooped her up in his beefy arms and marched down the hall. Daniel followed after making a show of yelling about her safety and the baby. The not-so-big but still-quite-large one, named Ransal but affectionately nicknamed Curly, marched behind Daniel holding his staff weapon at the ready.

They had just made it to the, blessedly empty, intersection that led to the Al’Kesh bay when Vala jerked suddenly and fell out of the arms of not-Teal’c. She quickly swept her leg out in front of her and knocked the guard on his ass. She was quickly on him, pummelling him with fists filled with righteous fury.

When Daniel saw Vala fall to the ground and land in a crouch he whipped around and wrenched the staff weapon out of the hands of the very surprised Curly. With one swing he had knocked the guard down. Two shots, one for each guard, and he and Vala were on their way to safety.

***

They had agreed that they should find a Tauri ally who had a Remote Dialling Device they could use to contact the SGC. Bra’tac seemed like the most obvious solution though Daniel was kind of hoping for the Tok’ra. If he could get Vala to the Tok’ra then maybe they could take Qetesh out and he could save her. He could save her in the way he had never been able to save his wife.

The Al’Kesh moved through the cold emptiness of space and settled firmly upon the ground of the nearest planet. A quick mental calculation later and Daniel was dialling the address for Chulak. They were hoping that Vala could pretend to be Qetesh and no one would give them any trouble. They would find Bra’tac, dial earth, and deal with the mess of everything else once they were safe at the SGC. Of course Daniel knew that things were rarely that simple. When they walked through the gate on Chulak it was unguarded.  _Okay, that was easy._  They made their way to the village and asked someone if they had seen Master Bra’tac. They were given directions to his home. 

Bra’tac was, understandably, shocked to see Daniel Jackson standing in front of him. He was more so surprised to see him in the company of the false god Qetesh. When Daniel explained to him everything that had happened Bra’tac agreed to assist them.  _Another easy win._ _Daniel knew he had been lucky so far but he had learned the hard way to always be on guard._

***

The doctors of the SGC were cautious when it came to their two new patients. Daniel was given a clean bill of health and was, after a few days, released to his old room with all of his old stuff. He spent most of his time with Vala. Sitting with her in her holding cell, going to her doctor’s appointments, getting to hear her debriefings for the General. She shared everything she could with them. She spent hours, days, weeks telling them everything she could. Daniel was surprisingly very proud of her.

When, after a month and a half, they finally called Daniel and Vala into the debriefing room to talk about removing Qetesh he was beginning to feel antsy. He spoke before he had even sat down.

“General, I would like to ask if Vala could be released into personal quarters.” He strode in purposefully and sat in the seat next to Jack. He left the seat between himself and Sam empty for Vala. “She can stay with me and we can keep guards stationed outside of the door. Still safe and secure, but she’ll be more comfortable. We can’t forget that Vala is a victim here.”

The rest of SG-1 looked at him and he looked back. He frowned. “What? She is.”

Jack raised an eyebrow at him and looked around him to Sam. “He never changed.” He looked over at Daniel. “It’s good to have you back Spacemonkey but I guess it was always hard to kill you.” He winked at Vala as she took her seat. She just raised an eyebrow at him.

Daniel smiled then turned serious. “So, can Vala be released to me?”

General Hammond looked at him and smiled tightly. “We’ve been considering that Dr. Jackson but first I would like to hear what your team has to say about removal of the Goa’uld symbiote.”

Sam leaned forward. “Right, well as I’m sure you’re all aware we’ve attempted removal before. With Kowalski it wasn’t successful. However, I believe since Qetesh is dormant that we’ll have a better chance of removing her without the chance of a relapse. I’ve been in contact with my father and he tells me that they have extraction techniques available to them. He and Selmak are trying to convince the counsel to help us. I haven’t heard back from him. Yet. Our plan is to wait for my father to get back to me in the next week about extraction. If the Tok’ra won’t help we’ll go in surgically.”

“I’m sorry to ask,” Vala spoke for the first time and all eyes turned to her, “will surgery put the baby at risk?” Daniel looked at her in concern. “This may sound uncharacteristically selfless of me but I don’t want to risk the pregnancy.”

Sam shook her head. “I don’t know what sort of risk surgery will pose to your pregnancy. The whole process was rather stressful to Kowalski but we’ve refined it and we’re hopeful as to the outcome. But Vala,” she smiled at her new friend and squeezed her hand, “surgery is our _last_ option. I’m also looking into developing a sort of paralytic for the symbiote that will aid in the surgery. We won’t risk you or the pregnancy. With any luck the Tok’ra will help us.”

Daniel interjected his own thoughts before anyone else could speak. “If the Tok’ra don’t help and the surgery doesn’t work, and for some reason the pregnancy is lost, Qetesh will come back and Vala will be lost unless the Tok’ra change their minds. If the two options we have fail and the pregnancy does continue when Vala gives birth, our child will be rapidly aged and Qetesh will be back again. If that does happen do the Tok’ra have some way of stopping the baby from aging? Would they help us then?”

Sam just shook her head. “I’m sorry Daniel but I just don’t know. There’s no way of knowing without having any experience in something like this. I’m still hopeful that the Tok’ra will agree to help us.”

“Well then for our sake,” Vala spoke, her hand rubbing her barely visible baby bump, “you’re hope better not be misplaced.”

***

Vala was being released from custody/observation the next day and he had decided to go out and buy her clothing and other things she may need. Seeing her in the SGC gray prison jumpsuit attire she had been forced to wear since their escape was almost painful. Jack had, in true Jack fashion, invited himself along so he could corner Daniel and talk to him about things. They were on the way to the mall to purchase maternity clothes when Jack pulled the car over.  _Of course he had insisted on driving._

“So Daniel, what’s going on with you and Vala?” His voice had that joking tone that Daniel knew belied his true interest and seriousness.

Daniel just looked at him in annoyance. “Other than we’re expecting a baby, trying to regain our lives, and are attempting to find a way for her to escape subjugation and our child’s fate of become a hyper-aged host to a false god? Not much.”

Jack just huffed. “Alright. I guess what I was actually asking was, how do you _feel_ about her?”

Daniel sighed and let his head fall back against the headrest. His eyes were closed and he exhaled loudly out of his nose. “I don’t know Jack. After Sha’re…” His voice caught. “I didn’t think I would ever feel  _anything_ , except maybe rage. It was so unfair what happened to her. Vala, Vala went through the same thing only for much longer. And, as I’ve gotten to know her, I can tell that being taken as host wasn’t even the scariest thing that has ever happened to her. Vala had a rough life. We actually have a lot in common. Absentee parents, though in fairness mine are dead, unstable living arrangements, a desire to move beyond what we were dealt. The only thing is, I was able to and Vala, she was taken prisoner in her own body before she ever really got the chance.” He lifted his hands in a futile gesture.

“I care about her Jack. I do. We spent two months together before we made it back to the SGC. We spent every waking moment together, getting to know one another.” Daniel released a loud sigh. “She used to listen to me, well Qetesh did, when I told another prisoner about all of the memories I had as they came back to me. Qetesh wanted leverage over me. But those moments had a different outcome. Vala told me that’s why she trusted me so quickly. She knew I was a good man. She  _remembered_  watching me, listening to me, and she trusted me.

“Even if I didn’t care about her, which I do, she’s the mother of my child. That means something to me. It means a lot to me. I don’t want anything to happen to them. Vala didn’t ask for this baby any more than I did but, in a lot of ways, this baby is saving her. It’s saving both of us. I know you’re worried Jack but don’t be. I care for Vala, given time I may even love her.” He looked over at Jack then. His best friend had a grin on his face. “What?”

Jack just shook his head and patted Daniel on the shoulder. “Well Daniel, when you decide to date again you really don’t mess around. I’m happy for you. Vala’s great. I’ve spent some time with her myself and I know that Sam considers her a friend. Just don’t rush into things and,” Here Jack frowned, “I’d hate to see you get hurt if we can’t help Vala.”

With that admission Jack turned the car back on and they continued on their way to finished their shopping.

***

Jacob Carter was not the bearer of good news. He also wasn’t necessarily the bearer of _bad_ news. He just brought news. The Tok’ra were willing to  _meet_  Vala, to hear her case, to evaluate the safety of an extraction in her condition, and to make a decision then. Daniel didn’t like it, Sam was hopeful, and Vala was nauseated. Every time she thought that maybe her and Daniel and the baby would be safe, more uncertainty came their way.

Her stomach was still on the small side but she was obviously pregnant. Her body was expanding and her appetite had grown accordingly. She had discovered, much to her mixed feelings, that with the beginning of her second trimester that she was much more interested in the physical side of comfort. Daniel was willing to hold her but any thought of intimacy was out of the question. At least that’s how she had interpreted things. They hadn’t even seen each other naked since she was still Qetesh.

Vala didn’t know if Daniel found her unappealing but the thought of Daniel being disgusted by her made her heart sore. She longed for his hands to caress her in the gentle way she knew he could. She wanted to taste his lips and feel his desire while she was in control of her body. She wanted Daniel to whisper her name in her ear while she held him close to her. He had never been gentle or loving with Qetesh but, Vala hoped, he could be with her. Someday. She was also afraid that she would never get the chance to feel these things while she had control. If they failed, she’d be lost again, and Daniel would truly never hold her again.

She didn’t know how to ask him if he was so disgusted by what had happened that he could never imagine being with her in every way. They didn’t even really know each other.  _That’s not entirely true._  She and Daniel had decided to be perfectly honest with one another. They had shared everything. No one in the galaxy knew Vala as well as Daniel did. But they never seemed to actually  _talk._  Not about how they felt or about what they would do if and when the baby was born.

As she stood in their shared room and looked down at their shared bed she could only sigh. Daniel had requested that they share this room. He had made no move to find a different sleeping arrangement. He had been so kind, gentle, and caring during their time together. He had purchased her clothing as her ever expanded body demanded it, he woke up with her in the middle of the night to comfort her through her nightmares, he had whispered words of peace and hope when she shared her fears for their child. If he was this way, why did he not say how he feels? How was she to know?

The sound of him entering the room behind her pulled her from her thoughts. Her shoulders were tense with apprehension and her whole body felt like a tightly coiled spring. She was about to turn around to face him when his arms slid around her and he embraced her from behind. He had never held her like this, never had he put his arms around her and settled his body against her. She felt his hands come to rest on her middle, gently placed over the place where their child rested.

“I won’t let them hurt you.” His voice was a soft murmur in her ear. His breath was warm and comforting. “I won’t let them hurt either of you. You have to trust that.”

She put her own hands over his and leaned into him, absorbing his warmth and comfort. “I trust you Daniel. I know you’ll do everything you can but…” Her voice cracked with emotion. “But what if they do the extraction and they don’t care about the baby? What if they refuse to help at all? Daniel I can’t-“ A choked sob came from her mouth and she brought her hands up to stifle the sound.

Daniel walked around her and placed a hand on either side of her face and gently lifted it so she would look him in the eye. “Listen to me. We will figure this out. I won’t let them hurt the baby but I also won’t leave you this way. I care too much about you to let you go back to that.” He wrapped his arms around her and held her in a snug embrace.

She snaked her arms around him and returned the pressure. Her muffled reply brought a small smile to his face. “I care about you too Daniel. I trust you.” The word love never exchanged between them but, in that moment, it was felt by both.

***

 The sight of the Tok'ra facility made Daniel nervous. The crystals were beautiful but cold. They perfectly reflected his feelings about this entire situation. He had a ball of cold dread in his stomach and no matter how many time he told Vala that everything would be alright, he had no way of actually knowing that. She held his hand tightly the entire time they were there, never letting go of her anchor. He was glad for it because it helped to keep him centered. The counsel was assembled and a medical professional from among the Tok'ra was brought forward to examine Vala. She held his hand like a vice but she made it through.

Extraction was, apparently, a very taxing procedure. However, the Tok'ra believed that the surgical option would put more strain on her body than she or the baby could handle so they were inclined to do it the Tok'ra way. Daniel let out a sigh of relief and he could see some of the tension leave Vala's body. They were going to extract Qetesh and destroy her. That was the end of that.  _Good riddance._  Now Daniel wanted to know what they could do to stop the rapid aging that their poor, innocent child would go through once it was born. 

The Tok'ra leading the counsel spoke in answer to his question. "We have considered this issue, Daniel Jackson, and we are afraid  _we_ do not possess the means to help you."

He frowned and then gestured towards them with one hand. " _You_  don't have the means but you know someone who does?"

"There is a planet on which a people who possess the means to do this dwell. Their city is a day’s journey from the Chappa'ai. Even if you find their city there is no guarantee that they will assist you." 

Daniel smiled a determined smile and replied. "That's a chance I'm willing to take."

***

It was a hard walk to the city but night had just fallen when they reached the glowing lights. People were still out in the streets and paid no mind to five more travelers arriving. Jacob/Selmak lead Jack, Daniel, Sam, and Teal'c towards the home of the scientist he hoped would be willing to help Daniel and Vala. Vala herself was at the SGC waiting for their return. Daniel hated the idea of leaving Vala there but she had assured him that she  _wanted at least one of them there and if walking for a day was too much for her then he would just have to do it for her._ The closer they got to the scientist the more anxious Daniel felt. This was his child's life on the line. This wasn't just about him anymore. This was about his family; it was about protecting his child and securing the happiness of himself and the woman he was pretty sure he was in madly in love with. 

The man, Larin, allowed them into his home and Daniel explained the problem. Larin sat before him, his flowing grey shirt tucked into dark brown breaches marked him as a healer as much as any white coat would on Earth. His grey hair and bushy eyebrows marked him with experience. Beneath the eyebrows Daniel saw two deep brown eyes filled with determination and compassion.

This man was going to help them. He would need to see Vala, he would need samples, and he would need time. Daniel could give him the first two easily, but as Vala approached her fifth month, time was quickly becoming a rare commodity. 

Larin agreed to go back to the SGC with them and brought his equipment along. Daniel hated to feel so excited and hopeful. He had experienced this feeling before and it never ended well. He needed to remind himself that so far things had worked out well for them. The exam was decidedly noninvasive, for which both Daniel and Vala were grateful. Blood was drawn as well as amniotic fluid. The scientist worked for days trying to find a solution. Daniel and Vala spent that time trying to keep their minds off of what was happening. They thought of names for their child, the little girl they now knew that Vala carried. 

Daniel wanted a traditional name, an Earth name, and Vala was inclined to name their child something beautiful from both of their worlds. They agreed on finding names that could be found on both and settled on Clara. It was close to Daniel's mothers name, Claire, and Cliara was the name of a beautiful flower on Vala's homeworld. Clara Mal Doran Jackson. Now that she had a name, she needed a future. 

Larin worked diligently and on his twelfth day at the SGC declared that he had the solution. The technology already existed, the Tok'ra had already told them that, but what Larin needed to know was whether their technology would work on the baby's DNA. It had never been used to slow aging in an infant. And surely never on someone with such unique aging properties. After much testing Larin came to the conclusion that if they used the device on a fetus while it was still developing that they could fundamentally alter the coding that caused the baby to age and hold such terribly massive knowledge. If the device worked as they hoped, Clara Mal Doran Jackson would be born and grow just like any other child in the galaxy. 

***

The procedure was schedule to take place on Larin's fourteenth day. It was simple enough. He said, Vala need only lie back and allow the device to work. As she lay on the hospital bed, her hand tightly grasping Daniel's, she could only hope that she had shed her last tears over this. The device itself was deceptively small. It was round with a sleek display and could fit in the palm of Larin's hand. He placed it on the bed next to Vala's left hip and activated it. 

"Don't worry now," he spoke soothingly, "you won't feel anything and neither will the little one. It's quite simple and perfectly painless." He smiled a reassuring smile and moved over to the end of the bed. 

Daniel squeezed her hand and smiled down at her. She let the comfort he offered wash over her. When she meekly smiled back Daniel turned to Larin. "How will we know when it's done? How will we know it worked?"

Larin gestured to the device. "When it has finished its program it will emit a faint beep and then shut down. Once it has finished I will run another test of the amniotic fluid and we will know for sure if the child has been altered." As much as Daniel hated the word altered he couldn't help but feel a little hope when he heard the word. If this all worked, in four months his baby, their Clara, would be here and safe and sound in the world. His mind was drawn from images of a little girl with blue eyes and black hair by the sound of a much anticipated beep. 

Vala smiled at him and Larin removed the device from her side. The amniotic fluid was retrieved in a way that made Daniel feel equal parts queasy and intrigued. He felt bad for Vala; she had to endure the pregnancy, the stress, and also the poking and prodding. If he could take any of it, he would. He could hardly wait for the results. His palm was sweating and he could feel Vala's own tension through their clasped hands. 

Larin turned to them with a bright smile. "It has worked. The child has been altered."

***

Daniel Jackson once again spent time to take stock of his surroundings. The faint glow of a night light in his daughter’s room peaked out through her opened door. Her brother sleeping peacefully in the room across from hers. The house was quiet and dark and warm. He looked down where his beautiful wife lay in his arms as they reclined on the couch. The flickering light from their tv casting shadows in the living room.

Years ago he had fought for his family. Years ago he had fought to remember who he is. Years ago he had felt lost and hopeless. Now. Now he felt like the luckiest man in the universe. He had so much to live for and so much to fight for. As the Goa’uld lay in ruins and the Jaffa finally have freedom, Daniel knows that the galaxy is a safer place for his family.

He can’t wait to share all of its wonders with his children. Someday he will but today he’ll just enjoy having them around. 


End file.
